19th May 1943, London.
Dear Nancy,
Just realized that i am the unluckiest guy in the world. There might be mighty lot of similarities in my misfortunes and those of other insipid beings on this planet but my greatest misfortune, which in fact outweighs the others out of competition, is that i don't have you, the girl i love, in my life anymore. You have always been that special someone for me ever since the moment i set my dreamy eyes on you. Every word you spoke, every movement of your lips, every turn of your head are burnt forever in my memory. Ever since you entered my life my life has been vibrant and a new ray of hope had illuminated my otherwise dark cell of a life. I had this valiant hope that my life was changing for the better, finally. After years of remorse, deceit and distress i thought this dog was finally having his day. You gate crashed into my life and promised a capsize in fortunes. You gave me sleepless nights and dreamy days. I prayed. I pleaded. I begged God to gift you to me. I wanted to take care of you. I wanted to keep you smiling throughout your life. Wanted to live in your every laugh and die time and again in your every tear. Wanted to kiss your lips till eternity and drown in your eyes, filled with love.
I promised myself to keep you happy. Convinced myself that i am your best choice, rather than any other man who was less of a man than i am. I prepared myself for you. My home, my parents, my friends. We were just waiting for you to set foot in our lives. We all loved you. I loved you the most, unconditionally. I loved you more than anyone could possibly have had in your life. I loved you for who you were rather than for the person who you were pretending to be in your professional life. I knew the real you. I chose to ignore the professional 'you' because i knew you had to put up a pretentious face to match with the equally pretentious people around you. I had seen you talking, smiling, conversing, some times intimately, with other guys. I trusted you. I expected you to come to me always at the end of the day. You did initially but then somewhere down the line i got busy and couldn't set aside enough time for you. Tough times overwhelmed you, you needed me, but alas i was away, busy. You found another shoulder to cry upon. That person slowly became your best friend. Soon enough something more than a friend. And eventually everything but a friend. When i came back, realization struck and i immediately knew i was too late when your eyes didn't meet mine with the same love it had radiated, a year ago.
I have to blame myself for having lost you. I should have spent more time with you. I miss you now. I miss you very very much. I miss that part of me which was you. I am half of the guy now than when i was with you. I sometimes try to convince myself that i can forget you and move on but then i realize you were my everything, my very soul found solace in your arms, hence its impossible for me to even think of forgetting you. I knew we had the best of times when we were together. We rarely took our eyes of each other. How can i ever forget all those good times we had when we courted and fell madly in love with each other? Your laughs, those kisses, those murmurs in my ears, those whispers of pleasantries. Those unforgettable moments. Those delicious memories. Bliss. We were inseparable. We were meant to be together my dear. Together forever. You wont be able to find anyone better than me for yourself. Now shamelessly but selfishly i ask is it possible for me to have another chance? I promise to be with you always. I can quit work and search for a job in the local. Can i have another chance to hold you in my arms and kiss your forehead? Another chance to make my dream of leading a life with you come true? I want to meet you just once. Will be in Derby 4 months later. Please don't say a 'no', cant live with it.
Will wait for your reply. If possible send me your contact number. I Love you.
Yours forever,
Shaun
A month later...
16th June 1943, Derby
Dear Shaun,
I was so glad to hear from you. I had been hoping for some sort of communication from you or about your whereabouts. I was worried to death. I have no words to express how happy i am after seeing your letter. Especially after what happened in the beginning of this year i shouldn't have expected anything from you but deep down inside me i knew that at some point you will remember me and try to contact me.
I remember everything my sweetheart but you need to accept the fact that things have changed. I was crazy for your love in the beginning but when you got busy i confided my feelings in someone else. His name is Ronney Marshall. He's a stock broker too. He is a very nice guy. He has been a pillar of support and a constant companion whenever the going got tough for me. He has done so much for me and i am really grateful to him. We have been dating for almost 6 months now. My folks like him too. Truth is he loves me more than anyone else. I love him too now. We will be getting engaged soon. Probably get married early next year. I have never been happier in my life. I know you still love me dear and probably need me more than ever, but things cant be undone now. I cant be yours. I'm really pained to ask you to search for someone else. Am sure you will find someone better than me. I can always be your friend. Please let me know when you are in town. I would love to meet you. By the way how is work treating you? My telephone connection has been suspended indefinitely as the poles were blown away in a storm last month. Pen me your reply.
Your best friend,
Nancy
A month later...
18th July 1943, London.
Dear Nancy,
As much as I'm happy reading that you are sound and happy I'm equally devastated by your smooth denial of my love. Its so easy for you to say “search for someone else” isn't it? If things were that easy and uncomplicated i wouldn't have bothered writing to you in the first place would i? Please understand. You are my only hope in this world. You are the light at the end of the dark tunnel for me. Please don't do this to me. I cant just move on. Neither can we be just friends. I want you in my life as my partner in happiness and sorrow. I want you to marry you, have kids, buy a ranch in the country side, take you for a horse ride, rest on the green pastures and sing a song looking into your eyes. I have so many dreams for us. I have planned out everything for our future. Please don't push me away. I appreciate the fact that Ronney was beside you taking care of you when i was away but i was away at work. Earning. Struggling. I don't want to sound rude but if anyone has to be your friend, Ronney should, not me. How can he even think of stealing my girlfriend while I'm away?
I was at that segment of my life when i had to work till i bled from my skin. I was always thinking about you. Worried. Missing you so much. Not a day passed by without me shedding a tear thinking of the distance between us. Now i can be with you. Forever. I can do everything right this time. I will be there on the 19th of September. I want to meet you as soon as i reach there.
I love you.
Yours forever,
Shaun
A month later...
15th August 1943, Derby
Dear Shaun,
I know what you must be going through at this point of time. But please understand that the situation is very different now. What has happened has happened and nothing can change now. I know you love me very much but i don't love you anymore. I love Ronney. He is and will be the only guy in my life after this. I don't agree with you when you told he stole me from you. You pursued your so called dream even though my father was generous enough to offer you a respectable post in his company. You were adamant. When you left i was lonely and scared and Rooney was the one who was with me throughout, not you. He proved to be a better partner than you. I am sorry for having told that point blank but thats the truth you will need to acquaint with dear. If you hadn't gone away probably we would have still been together but alas life is a mystery and we cant help falling victims to its nuances.
I want you to move on with your life. I need to speak to you to convince you. I will be at the station to receive you on the 19th.
Your best friend,
Nancy
A month later...
20th September 1943, Derby
Dear Shaun,
Were you sure about the date when you said you would be here on the 19th ? I was there at the station yesterday and I checked all the coaches thinking you might have dozed off in one of them, but i didn't find you. Is everything alright? If you have had a change of plans and are planning to visit Derby later on this year please let me know. I will be waiting for you.
Your best friend,
Nancy
3 months later...
15th December 1943, Derby
Dear Shaun,
I am very disappointed with your behavior. First you make me search every coach in a train and make me look like a fool then to top it up you don't reply to my mail? Are you angry with me? Is that why you are doing this? If you are, let me tell you that i will be sending you a letter every month till you eventually decide to reply. I want us to be friends. Good friends. I want you to be happy. I can sort out things with you only when i can talk to you, thats why im eager to meet you. I don't want you to waste your whole life because of me.
I am waiting for your reply. Please reply as soon as possible.
Your best friend,
Nancy
a months later...
20th January 1944, Derby
Dear Shaun,
I still haven't received any reply from you. Are you keeping fine? I hope you are. I will continue to send you a mail every month until to decide that my mails are worth replying to. Take care.
Your best friend,
Nancy
3 letters and months later...
3rd April 1944, Derby
Dear Shaun,
Fate has played a cruel game with me yet again. My life is in a total mess once again. I am in pain. I am writing this letter with tears crowding my eyes. I should have realized that things were too good to be true. I found out that Ronney was cheating on me. We were engaged just about a week back. One of his colleagues tipped me off about Ronney's other side. He had a secret, intimate and physical relationship with one of his colleagues. He bluntly denied it at first. I trusted him. But once i saw him in an unmistakable posture with the other girl on his desk when i stormed into his cabin planning to surprise him, i knew he was lying. I broke up with him immediately and threw the engagement ring in his face. I cried my heart out for a week. I was completely devastated. I never saw this coming. I thought that my life was stabilizing at last but in the end it turned out to be another game that life had played with me. I am too innocent for this hostile world around me. I need someone who can be with me throughout. That someone is you. Every time i think of happy moments i think of the moments i spent with you. Those were the times i used to relish and till now cherish. I need you dear. I was lying when i said i wasn't in love with you anymore. I still love you as much as i loved you in the beginning. I was just scared that you will leave me alone again and Ronney was manipulating my emotions in his favour. I never let him get physical with me because you are the only man i have ever been with and i wasn't ready for anyone else. Probably thats why that dog went in search of another mongrel. I will never forgive him for cheating me. Even if i do i hope God wont. He will burn in hell. I hate him now. Now when i think of him i only see how much better you were than him even though you were away and how much better our relationship was. Incomparable.
I have been thinking of you incessantly for the past few months. Your undiluted love is what i want. I have no words to express how sorry i am for having chewed your love and hurt you. I can do anything in this world to make it up to you and be yours again. I want to rest there in your arms and discover my smile again. I want to feel your warmth again. I miss your smile. Its with your smile that you floored me didn't you? I want to see that smile and be the reason for it for the rest of our life. I want to marry you and have a dozen kids. I want to give you everything that you dreamed for. Here onwards fulfilling your every desire is my sole purpose in life. My mind body and soul is yours for the taking my love. Please accept me and don't push me away. I f you do i will die that instant. I love you. Will be waiting for your reply.
Yours forever,
Nancy
-------------Shaun worked in the infantry division of the British army.. He was sent on a mission to counter the Nazi infiltration of an allied strong hold in Europe. He was killed in action. He was found clutching a blood stained letter, addressed to Nancy, which he had written to be posted later-----------------------
30th April 1944
Dear Nancy,
First let me tell you im really sorry i couldn't reply to your mail for a few months. I was sent to a secret location in Africa, training for a dangerous mission. We had no access to mail or even a pigeon. I read all your mails the moment i came back to London but hardly had time to scribble a reply because i was whisked away by a general, who wanted me on his mission, the day after i reached London. I am writing this letter as and when im flying over Europe 20 minutes away from parachuting into the enemy lines. This is a very dangerous mission but am sure your love will keep me alive. I will come back to you at any cost.
Am so happy that God had rewarded my resilience and true love, finally. Its a pity that we are so far away right now. If i were with you right now i would hug you tightly, like i never intend to let you away from me ever again and shower you with kisses. I would first kiss your eyes, then your small cute nose and then your lips. I will then carry you in my arms and kiss you once more. Then i will dig myself in your beautiful hair for a while and whisper a 'I love you'. Then upstairs to the bedroom to work on the dozen kids you were taking about.
How stupid can you be to think i would ever push you away? You are my wife. My better half. Even though we aren't married yet i have been living my life till now thinking that you were my wife and you belonged only to me and i to you. We are destined to be together. I cant live without you. You are my very source of life. I need you.
So let me just finish up with my mission and i promise we will go to the country side, sit by a stream, and love each other till the end of eternity. I have so much to tell you and can't wait to see you after such a long time.
Keep the door wide open and wait by the threshold my sweetheart. Come running to me when you spot me at a distance. I don't want to waste time missing you.
I love you.
Yours till the end of time,
Shaun
Dear Nancy,
Just realized that i am the unluckiest guy in the world. There might be mighty lot of similarities in my misfortunes and those of other insipid beings on this planet but my greatest misfortune, which in fact outweighs the others out of competition, is that i don't have you, the girl i love, in my life anymore. You have always been that special someone for me ever since the moment i set my dreamy eyes on you. Every word you spoke, every movement of your lips, every turn of your head are burnt forever in my memory. Ever since you entered my life my life has been vibrant and a new ray of hope had illuminated my otherwise dark cell of a life. I had this valiant hope that my life was changing for the better, finally. After years of remorse, deceit and distress i thought this dog was finally having his day. You gate crashed into my life and promised a capsize in fortunes. You gave me sleepless nights and dreamy days. I prayed. I pleaded. I begged God to gift you to me. I wanted to take care of you. I wanted to keep you smiling throughout your life. Wanted to live in your every laugh and die time and again in your every tear. Wanted to kiss your lips till eternity and drown in your eyes, filled with love.
I promised myself to keep you happy. Convinced myself that i am your best choice, rather than any other man who was less of a man than i am. I prepared myself for you. My home, my parents, my friends. We were just waiting for you to set foot in our lives. We all loved you. I loved you the most, unconditionally. I loved you more than anyone could possibly have had in your life. I loved you for who you were rather than for the person who you were pretending to be in your professional life. I knew the real you. I chose to ignore the professional 'you' because i knew you had to put up a pretentious face to match with the equally pretentious people around you. I had seen you talking, smiling, conversing, some times intimately, with other guys. I trusted you. I expected you to come to me always at the end of the day. You did initially but then somewhere down the line i got busy and couldn't set aside enough time for you. Tough times overwhelmed you, you needed me, but alas i was away, busy. You found another shoulder to cry upon. That person slowly became your best friend. Soon enough something more than a friend. And eventually everything but a friend. When i came back, realization struck and i immediately knew i was too late when your eyes didn't meet mine with the same love it had radiated, a year ago.
I have to blame myself for having lost you. I should have spent more time with you. I miss you now. I miss you very very much. I miss that part of me which was you. I am half of the guy now than when i was with you. I sometimes try to convince myself that i can forget you and move on but then i realize you were my everything, my very soul found solace in your arms, hence its impossible for me to even think of forgetting you. I knew we had the best of times when we were together. We rarely took our eyes of each other. How can i ever forget all those good times we had when we courted and fell madly in love with each other? Your laughs, those kisses, those murmurs in my ears, those whispers of pleasantries. Those unforgettable moments. Those delicious memories. Bliss. We were inseparable. We were meant to be together my dear. Together forever. You wont be able to find anyone better than me for yourself. Now shamelessly but selfishly i ask is it possible for me to have another chance? I promise to be with you always. I can quit work and search for a job in the local. Can i have another chance to hold you in my arms and kiss your forehead? Another chance to make my dream of leading a life with you come true? I want to meet you just once. Will be in Derby 4 months later. Please don't say a 'no', cant live with it.
Will wait for your reply. If possible send me your contact number. I Love you.
Yours forever,
Shaun
A month later...
16th June 1943, Derby
Dear Shaun,
I was so glad to hear from you. I had been hoping for some sort of communication from you or about your whereabouts. I was worried to death. I have no words to express how happy i am after seeing your letter. Especially after what happened in the beginning of this year i shouldn't have expected anything from you but deep down inside me i knew that at some point you will remember me and try to contact me.
I remember everything my sweetheart but you need to accept the fact that things have changed. I was crazy for your love in the beginning but when you got busy i confided my feelings in someone else. His name is Ronney Marshall. He's a stock broker too. He is a very nice guy. He has been a pillar of support and a constant companion whenever the going got tough for me. He has done so much for me and i am really grateful to him. We have been dating for almost 6 months now. My folks like him too. Truth is he loves me more than anyone else. I love him too now. We will be getting engaged soon. Probably get married early next year. I have never been happier in my life. I know you still love me dear and probably need me more than ever, but things cant be undone now. I cant be yours. I'm really pained to ask you to search for someone else. Am sure you will find someone better than me. I can always be your friend. Please let me know when you are in town. I would love to meet you. By the way how is work treating you? My telephone connection has been suspended indefinitely as the poles were blown away in a storm last month. Pen me your reply.
Your best friend,
Nancy
A month later...
18th July 1943, London.
Dear Nancy,
As much as I'm happy reading that you are sound and happy I'm equally devastated by your smooth denial of my love. Its so easy for you to say “search for someone else” isn't it? If things were that easy and uncomplicated i wouldn't have bothered writing to you in the first place would i? Please understand. You are my only hope in this world. You are the light at the end of the dark tunnel for me. Please don't do this to me. I cant just move on. Neither can we be just friends. I want you in my life as my partner in happiness and sorrow. I want you to marry you, have kids, buy a ranch in the country side, take you for a horse ride, rest on the green pastures and sing a song looking into your eyes. I have so many dreams for us. I have planned out everything for our future. Please don't push me away. I appreciate the fact that Ronney was beside you taking care of you when i was away but i was away at work. Earning. Struggling. I don't want to sound rude but if anyone has to be your friend, Ronney should, not me. How can he even think of stealing my girlfriend while I'm away?
I was at that segment of my life when i had to work till i bled from my skin. I was always thinking about you. Worried. Missing you so much. Not a day passed by without me shedding a tear thinking of the distance between us. Now i can be with you. Forever. I can do everything right this time. I will be there on the 19th of September. I want to meet you as soon as i reach there.
I love you.
Yours forever,
Shaun
A month later...
15th August 1943, Derby
Dear Shaun,
I know what you must be going through at this point of time. But please understand that the situation is very different now. What has happened has happened and nothing can change now. I know you love me very much but i don't love you anymore. I love Ronney. He is and will be the only guy in my life after this. I don't agree with you when you told he stole me from you. You pursued your so called dream even though my father was generous enough to offer you a respectable post in his company. You were adamant. When you left i was lonely and scared and Rooney was the one who was with me throughout, not you. He proved to be a better partner than you. I am sorry for having told that point blank but thats the truth you will need to acquaint with dear. If you hadn't gone away probably we would have still been together but alas life is a mystery and we cant help falling victims to its nuances.
I want you to move on with your life. I need to speak to you to convince you. I will be at the station to receive you on the 19th.
Your best friend,
Nancy
A month later...
20th September 1943, Derby
Dear Shaun,
Were you sure about the date when you said you would be here on the 19th ? I was there at the station yesterday and I checked all the coaches thinking you might have dozed off in one of them, but i didn't find you. Is everything alright? If you have had a change of plans and are planning to visit Derby later on this year please let me know. I will be waiting for you.
Your best friend,
Nancy
3 months later...
15th December 1943, Derby
Dear Shaun,
I am very disappointed with your behavior. First you make me search every coach in a train and make me look like a fool then to top it up you don't reply to my mail? Are you angry with me? Is that why you are doing this? If you are, let me tell you that i will be sending you a letter every month till you eventually decide to reply. I want us to be friends. Good friends. I want you to be happy. I can sort out things with you only when i can talk to you, thats why im eager to meet you. I don't want you to waste your whole life because of me.
I am waiting for your reply. Please reply as soon as possible.
Your best friend,
Nancy
a months later...
20th January 1944, Derby
Dear Shaun,
I still haven't received any reply from you. Are you keeping fine? I hope you are. I will continue to send you a mail every month until to decide that my mails are worth replying to. Take care.
Your best friend,
Nancy
3 letters and months later...
3rd April 1944, Derby
Dear Shaun,
Fate has played a cruel game with me yet again. My life is in a total mess once again. I am in pain. I am writing this letter with tears crowding my eyes. I should have realized that things were too good to be true. I found out that Ronney was cheating on me. We were engaged just about a week back. One of his colleagues tipped me off about Ronney's other side. He had a secret, intimate and physical relationship with one of his colleagues. He bluntly denied it at first. I trusted him. But once i saw him in an unmistakable posture with the other girl on his desk when i stormed into his cabin planning to surprise him, i knew he was lying. I broke up with him immediately and threw the engagement ring in his face. I cried my heart out for a week. I was completely devastated. I never saw this coming. I thought that my life was stabilizing at last but in the end it turned out to be another game that life had played with me. I am too innocent for this hostile world around me. I need someone who can be with me throughout. That someone is you. Every time i think of happy moments i think of the moments i spent with you. Those were the times i used to relish and till now cherish. I need you dear. I was lying when i said i wasn't in love with you anymore. I still love you as much as i loved you in the beginning. I was just scared that you will leave me alone again and Ronney was manipulating my emotions in his favour. I never let him get physical with me because you are the only man i have ever been with and i wasn't ready for anyone else. Probably thats why that dog went in search of another mongrel. I will never forgive him for cheating me. Even if i do i hope God wont. He will burn in hell. I hate him now. Now when i think of him i only see how much better you were than him even though you were away and how much better our relationship was. Incomparable.
I have been thinking of you incessantly for the past few months. Your undiluted love is what i want. I have no words to express how sorry i am for having chewed your love and hurt you. I can do anything in this world to make it up to you and be yours again. I want to rest there in your arms and discover my smile again. I want to feel your warmth again. I miss your smile. Its with your smile that you floored me didn't you? I want to see that smile and be the reason for it for the rest of our life. I want to marry you and have a dozen kids. I want to give you everything that you dreamed for. Here onwards fulfilling your every desire is my sole purpose in life. My mind body and soul is yours for the taking my love. Please accept me and don't push me away. I f you do i will die that instant. I love you. Will be waiting for your reply.
Yours forever,
Nancy
-------------Shaun worked in the infantry division of the British army.. He was sent on a mission to counter the Nazi infiltration of an allied strong hold in Europe. He was killed in action. He was found clutching a blood stained letter, addressed to Nancy, which he had written to be posted later-----------------------
30th April 1944
Dear Nancy,
First let me tell you im really sorry i couldn't reply to your mail for a few months. I was sent to a secret location in Africa, training for a dangerous mission. We had no access to mail or even a pigeon. I read all your mails the moment i came back to London but hardly had time to scribble a reply because i was whisked away by a general, who wanted me on his mission, the day after i reached London. I am writing this letter as and when im flying over Europe 20 minutes away from parachuting into the enemy lines. This is a very dangerous mission but am sure your love will keep me alive. I will come back to you at any cost.
Am so happy that God had rewarded my resilience and true love, finally. Its a pity that we are so far away right now. If i were with you right now i would hug you tightly, like i never intend to let you away from me ever again and shower you with kisses. I would first kiss your eyes, then your small cute nose and then your lips. I will then carry you in my arms and kiss you once more. Then i will dig myself in your beautiful hair for a while and whisper a 'I love you'. Then upstairs to the bedroom to work on the dozen kids you were taking about.
How stupid can you be to think i would ever push you away? You are my wife. My better half. Even though we aren't married yet i have been living my life till now thinking that you were my wife and you belonged only to me and i to you. We are destined to be together. I cant live without you. You are my very source of life. I need you.
So let me just finish up with my mission and i promise we will go to the country side, sit by a stream, and love each other till the end of eternity. I have so much to tell you and can't wait to see you after such a long time.
Keep the door wide open and wait by the threshold my sweetheart. Come running to me when you spot me at a distance. I don't want to waste time missing you.
I love you.
Yours till the end of time,
Shaun
